My Friend’s Suicide

by E. Walter Robinson ~ February 16th, 2010

So I just got word that an old friend from high school and college killed himself last week.

Obviously, my heart goes out to his family. I didn’t really know anyone that knew my friend and didn’t like him. He was absolutely brilliant, but he was so kind that you would never know it unless you got him near a computer. Then you would realize that his brain functioned on a different plane – he was *that* good as a programmer and thinker.

What I can’t help but think about right now is how much I hate death. I absolutely hate it.

Whether I am mourning and grieving along with everyone else, I am ministering to the family and friends of the deceased and officiating a funeral, or even if I am just doing the music for a memorial service, I am always struck by how much I hate death.

It was never really meant to be this way. Death is a curse on humanity. Granted, it is a deserved curse… but it is a curse nonetheless.

My fear is that, in our attempt to alleviate the pain we feel when someone we know dies, we try to explain death away. “It’s natural – just a part of life” or “God took them home” or “God wanted them in heaven with him” or some other nonsense. The Christianized versions of these statements aren’t actually Christian. Did you know that? The concept that God brings people up to him in heaven and that is where they reside forever doesn’t come from the New Testament. It comes from Plato and Socrates.

The Christian response to death, and my response to my friends death, is that I hate it. A lot. I feel sad and angry.

Now, that isn’t the end of the story, of course. Just like when Jesus died, that isn’t the end of the story. It’s odd that we call Good Friday good, when in fact it was a dark day for humanity. In and of itself, there really isn’t anything good about it.

But then Sunday comes, and there is Resurrection. New life. Physical life. The literal reversal of death itself.

That, my friends, is death redeemed. What is powerful about Christian spirituality is that I can call a bad thing bad. Death is bad.

But God redeems, just like he did on Sunday…

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2 Responses to My Friend’s Suicide

  1. MISTAKES

    MY life was almost perfect! Wow, the perfect couple, the perfect family and at the time a bright future on going

    When the word/idea of SUICIDE gets to a persons mind they don’t realize the terrible things and mistakes they can do by committing suicide. They are either hurt or don’t realize the pain they leave behind for those that they leave behind. my husband suicide and the tragedy was horrible… we went through the most difficult things/days of our lives. Hundred of questions unanswered, tears horrible feelings and emotions that are not able to et through.. as of yet, I still wish I could have done or help or I wish I could have stop him from killing himself.. The pain of being a single parent and seeing your children grow without a father (parent) is so so so difficult

    to my HUSBAND i wish you were here still with US! I know you are gone- but life would be so much better with you here!

  2. TheRevRuss

    Fantastic post, Eric. I’ve had the same thoughts too. Death is not natural. It sucks and it hurts. People make statements like the ones you mentioned with good intentions, but I don’t think they really realize what they’re saying. Thanks for sharing.

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